Families who yell
Being a loud family doesn’t necessarily mean that you are a family of yellers. High volume can be friendly and inclusive.
- Your child will learn to tune out the volume at home – and unless things are said in anger, when the tone changes, he’ll probably be totally comfortable in a noisy house.
- If the volume is always on high at home, your child may not learn how to ‘hear’ anyone who is softly spoken.
- If your child is always competing for ‘air-space’, he may not develop good listening skills because he’s too busy waiting for an opportunity to speak.
- Most children find high emotions frightening, so if you and your partner enjoy a feisty relationship, make sure that your sparring doesn’t make your child fearful that you don’t love each other or him. Many children who witness their parents constantly arguing worry about impending divorce and the break-up of the family.
- If you shout at your child in anger, in all likelihood he won’t hear what you’ve got to say – instead, he’ll just focus on your anger which will make him frightened.
If your child yells:
Most children who yell a lot – as opposed to just being generally loud - have had the behaviour modelled to them at home. So, if you don’t like your child yelling in anger, chances are that you will have to learn how to tone down your own anger, or develop other more acceptable ways to vent it.
How does yelling affect my child?
Depending on your child’s temperament, yelling will affect him more or less. Sensitive children – particularly babies - tend to find the rise in volume frightening, and it seems that the deeper the voice, the more upsetting it is.
Some children don’t seem to be particularly upset by yelling, though almost all children are unable to focus on what is being said, as they tend to only ‘hear’ the volume and tone that is being used.
- Find out what the impact is on your child when you yell
- Tips for dealing with sibling rivalry
- Find out what to do when your child swears
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- Why kids lie
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