There’s a quote that goes along the lines of, “I don’t know why my kids hate timeout. I tried it and I love it!” It’s very true. The other day, I sat myself on what we call ‘The Naughty Step’. My children looked up to see what I was doing. I just sat, and let out a sigh. The youngest came over, “get up Mummy”. I replied, “No I have been naughty”. My eldest asked, “how long until we are allowed to let you off?” I sighed, “37 minutes”. They both looked at each other and shook their heads. Then they skipped off to be silent somewhere (that’s never good). Weirdly that is the easiest “timeout” I get these days.
Since going back to work the second time around, many of my coffee group friendships have dried up. We chat online, but I am never available to meet up during the week and they are enjoying family time on the weekend. I don’t get out and meet people as often as I used to either, especially not without my munchkin army in tow. I often marvel at the ease my husband takes himself off to whatever fun event needs his attendance. He is much more able to allow himself timeout or maybe he knows he deserves it?
It takes a lot of effort for me to ask for some timeout from him and the children. Recently the first timeout that I had for 2016 was to see the new Star Wars movie. It was just me, a glass of wine and an ice cream cone. I was gone for about two hours and got home just in time to say goodnight.
We mums actually deserve a break from the little darlings. Whether you stay at home or work a job as well, it’s important to recognise the value you have for your family. It’s important to allow yourself time with friends and socialising outside of your home. Often we are so busy trying to make sure everyone else in our family is happy and getting what they need, we seldom look inwards to make sure we are okay as well. Or you might think that your mobile phone is the best socialising you can hope for.
If your partner is anything like my husband, he wants me to go out and have fun but he is not a mind reader. I actually have to remember to put some thought into it and then have the conversation with him so that my time happens. A play was being advertised today and I asked about me going. Unfortunately, he had something well and truly booked in. He felt bad and wished that I had said something earlier. I felt bad because I didn’t mean to forget his plans. However, now we both know I want to see a play and we can watch the local theatres for something else suitable. It will also give me time to consider inviting some people to come along as well.
What do you find the hardest thing about getting time out?